Murdered Victims to be Remembered

By Misty Foster, Sacramento POMC Chapter Leader

As the National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims draws near, one theme keeps emerging. I hear so many homicide survivors ask the same question: "Why do they tell me that it's been long enough and I should be over it by now, that I need to get on with my life?" It's hard to explain to those who have not been handed the life sentence of a homicide survivor that we don’t ever "get over it." We learn to live with it; we get through it, but we never get over it. We had no say in the violent, horrific ways our loved ones were stolen from us. As victims, we are often ignored or re-victimized by the justice system, the press, and sometimes by the very people who call themselves our friends.

"When we speak of our loved ones, please listen. It helps us to remember what made them special to us and to many others as well. We want to make sure they are never forgotten."

While every survivor copes in different ways, we all want the same basic things. First, that this horror had never happened in the first place, and secondly, that it never happens to another person, family, or loved one. So we become the voice for those who can no longer speak for themselves.

When we speak of our loved ones, please listen. It helps us to remember what made them special to us and to many others as well. We want to make sure they are never forgotten. And for many of us, talking about them is a part of the healing process.

Parents of Murdered Children (POMC) is a support group for anyone who has had a loved one die by violence. The Sacramento Area Chapter of POMC began its affiliation with the National Organization in January 2008. Our services include emotional support and friendship to homicide survivors, understanding and compassion, court accompaniment, and monthly meetings.

For more information about the Sacramento Area Chapter of POMC, please call 916-879-4541 or visit our website.

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Join POMC for a special ceremony to pay tribute to all murder victims everywhere
Tuesday, September 25th
5:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m.
North steps of the State Capitol

Speakers for the event include:

• Andrew Solomon, Sacramento District Attorney
• Mark Tyndale, President, Sacramento Police Officers Association (SPOA)
• Jon Myers, Deputy Executive Officer of Legislation and Public Affairs, Victim Compensation and Government Claims Board

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Misty Foster serves as the Parents of Murdered Children Sacramento Chapter Lead. Her brother David was murdered in March of 1991. His homicide remains unsolved to this day. Misty has chosen to honor his memory by becoming a voice for those who can no longer speak for themselves. “If we are loud enough, hopefully the monsters of this world will not win.”

Parents of Murdered Children — National Day of Remembrance

By Julie Nauman, VCGCB Executive Officer

September 25th marked the National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims, a day set aside each year to honor the lives of loved ones taken by violence. Once again, the local Sacramento Chapter of “Parents of Murdered Children” (POMC), in coordination with chapters around the nation, held a special ceremony to remember and pay honor to the sons, daughters and other family members that have been taken away all too soon.

I was privileged to be one of the selected speakers at this year’s POMC event on the north steps of the State Capitol. When I addressed the supporters and families, I conveyed that CalVCP is committed more than ever to helping parents recover from such tragedy. For many, the road to healing is long and arduous and now is a time when victims need our help the most, as well as our support. We understand that and provide mental health treatment, funeral and burial expenses, lost wages and much more for those who have no other means.

There were several other speakers on this day, including: Sean Laird, Sacramento Deputy District Attorney; Ahmale Dorsey, Victim Advocate; and Mindi Russell, Senior Chaplain, Sacramento Law Enforcement. All were on hand to share their thoughts and provide support to grieving parents and family members and be part of this community of victims and survivors.

Sadly, 38 percent of the victims that we help are under 18 years of age. And last year, 31 applications for assistance came to us from a parent or guardian who lost a child to violence. Every day, I see how important it is that we have this service for the thousands of families who have nowhere else to turn. We are continuing to work with our sister agencies to provide the necessary resources and care for these victims and their families. By doing this, we can ensure that Californians have somewhere to turn when the inconceivable happens.

As a united front, we shall always remember and honor all those who have become victims of murder and all those families who lost so much.